Damn I'm Lucky!

posted Sunday, 13 August 2006

In the past two weeks I have won 4 internet lotteries coming out of England.  Some are being paid in Euros the rest are being paid in English Pounds.  I haven't figured out the exact amount in American dollars, but it could be in the millions. 


Am I not the most lucky person you know?  Since I've practically fallen into this enormous fortune, I've decided to share it with all my blog buddies here at Blog-city.  First you are going to have to tell me what you are going to spend your millions on.  Not that it will make any difference in how I divide the money.  We'll all have an equal share.  I'm just curious how you will spend the money.


I am going to spend my share of the money buying my and Honey's parents, siblings, and our children, new houses and cars.  Then if there is anything left I would like to buy the "Shrub" a brain transplant.  Seeing that this is highly experimental surgery, worst case scenario could be that he still thinks the way he does now.  But being that I am an optimist, I could see the results falling to either side of the status quo with very good outcomes. If that flies over your head, I'll give you a personal explanation.


How are you going to spend your money?


This second fortune (see below), I find a bit disturbing.  Have they found that I could be distantly related to the deceased?  Or is Mr. Ibrahim thinking that I would be persuaded to defraud the bank that he works for by posing as a relative?  How did he choose me?  I see that we are friends.  I don't remember his name in my long list of acquaintances.  Is that neon "Sucker" sign lit on my forehead again?  Who falls for this crap?  Or do you, my blog buddies, think that this is legitimate and we could all be increasing our millions?  I'll await your urgent replies to my dilemma.



FROM THE DESK OF mr_danjuma_Ibrahim



BILLS AND EXCHANGE MANAGER,

BANK OF AFRICA (B.O.A)

OUAGADOUGOU-BURKINA FASO.



Dear Friend,



I am the manager of bill and exchange at the foreign remittance

department

of BANK OF Africa(B.O.A) here in Ouagadougou, Burkina Faso. In my

department

we discovered an abandoned sum of US$25m dollars (Twenty five Million

US

dollars) in an account that belongs to one of our foreign

customer (MR. ANDREAS SCHRANNER from Munich, Germany) who died along

with

his entire family in July 2003 in a plane crash.



http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/world/europe/859479.stm



Since we got information about his death, we have been expecting his

next of

kin to come over and claim his money because we cannot release it

unless

some body applies for it as next of kin or relation to the deceased as

indicated in our banking guidelines and laws but unfortunately we

learnt that

all his supposed next of kin or relation died alongside with him at the

plane crash

leaving nobody behind for the claim. It is therefore upon this

discovery

that I now decided to make this business proposal to you and release

the

money to you as the next of kin or relation to the deceased for safety

and

subsequent disbursement since nobody is coming for it and we don't want

this

money to go into the bank treasury as unclaimed bill.



The banking law and guideline here stipulates that if such money

remained

unclaimed after fours years, the money will be transferred into the bank

treasury as unclaimed fund. The request of foreigner as next of kin in

this

business is occasioned by the fact that the customer was a foreigner

and a

Burkinabe cannot stand as next of kin to a foreigner.



I agree that 30% of this money will be for you as a respect to the

provision

of a foreign account , 10% will be set aside for expenses incurred

during

the business and 60% would be for me Thereafter, I will visit your

country

for disbursement according to the percentage indicated Therefore, to

enable

the immediate transfer of this fund to you arranged,you must apply

first

to the bank as relation or next of kin of the deceased indicating your

bank

name, your bank account number, your private telephone and fax number

for

easy and effective communication and location where in the money will

be

remitted.



Upon receipt of your reply, I will send to you by fax or email the text

of

the application . I will not fail to bring to your notice this

transaction

is hitch-free and that you should not entertain any atom of fear as all

required arrangements have been made for the transfer. You should

contact

me immediately as soon as you receive this letter.



Trusting to hear from you immediately.

Yours Faithfully,

mr_danjuma_Ibrahim



BANK OF AFRICA (B.O.A)

TREAT AS URGENT AND CONFIDENCIAL



When the power-ball gets into the hundred million range, I often think of how I would spend the money.  The only problem with my chicken counting is that I never buy the tickets.  Did you notice the initials for Bank of Africa spell Boa?  Could this be a reference to the snake that squeezes the life out of it's prey?


What to do . . . .what to do.


Crap!  The spell checker fixed the spelling in my friends letter.

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1. Paula Reed left...
Monday, 14 August 2006 9:33 am

It's like those "phishing" letters that are supposedly from Paypal or some company that just needs your social security number to iron out some problem with your credit report. Who really logs on and puts their password info, SS number, and all that in?


2. kevin g left...
Monday, 14 August 2006 9:41 am

They're all scams, sorry! The dream is nice though! Don't respond, just have them listed as Spam!


3. Michelle left...
Monday, 14 August 2006 11:41 pm :: http://tsscusb.blog-city.com/

He asked for your phone number so you could email him back with this: (202) 324-3000. He'll call the FBI internet fraud dept. From what I was reading, they hope to target a senior citizen, who (sadly) often do believe these scam artists.

You can report him at their website too. http://www.fbi.gov/majcases/fraud/internetschemes.htm